Monday , June 17 2024

A New Socialist Answer to Inequality: Government arranged marriages.

These days, the craze of the left, of both the US and UK, and presumably the world over, is income inequality. Never mind that inequality has grown faster under Obama here in the states, obviously the evil Conservatives with their love of mammon are taking all their money from the poor leaving our countries destitute. You know, right now, as we speak, George Osborne and David Cameron are laughing all the way to the bank…to meet up with their banker buddies to throw a lavish party attended by Mitt Romney! There they will all burn 100 pound notes while they smoke big fat cigars! What can we, as innocent bystanders to there reign of terror, do to create a workers paradise in the face of such bad people?!

Team Ed’s plan for reducing inequality (or disingenuously taking votes, whatever same thing) is a 50p rate on top earners. Where is your Red spirit Red Eds?! No, here is a bolder and better plan to fix inequality, Obama you listen up too. THIS is the solution…

According to the Wall Street Journal one of the largest reasons for inequality is wealthier people marrying each other. People from better off (or should I say “oppressive”) homes send their children off to university, and what would you know, the spawn of the oppressive classes get together and marry each other cementing oppression for generations! No matter how much we tax them, they combine their incomes and marry each other. You would hope these professors could indoctrinate them enough to not marry, or at least marry the leftist professors to learn and please the grand academic wizards but noooo….they go around marrying each other. It shouldn’t be about love of each other, students should love socialism and the state! Well enough is enough! It’s time for government, the wisest and most just institution the world has ever seen, to take care of this problem.

My proposal for Obama, Team Ed and the glorious and wise EU bureaucrats is to arrange marriages. We need to force the rich to marry the poor. We need to force rich Englishmen to marry poorer Italians, Welsh women to marry French women and Scots to marry Bulgarians. The government needs to ban people of all incomes from marrying into their own income bracket. We need a US, UK, EU and heck, why not, UN panel to declare who can marry who and the people just need to accept it. That would distribute wealth accordingly and spread it the world over. Illegal marriages should be punishable by life imprisonment. This would create a more re-distributive, just and fair society.

Left….you’re welcome. Now, where are the nobel prize people, I am entitled to the peace and economics prize.

About Ted Yarbrough

Ted is the co-founder and editor of the Daily Globe. He is a long-time blogger on British politics and has written a thesis on Thatcherism.

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